Up at 4:00 AM to ride into Boston for the MRI. Stopped at Dunkin’ to pick up a preordered breakfast, and on the road by 4:45 AM. Very little traffic at this time of day, made it to MGH by 5:30. Maureen dropped me off at Yawkey,  parked, found a wheelchair,  and wheeled me over to the main wing and Ellison section. But of course it wasn’t open yet since the appointment was for 7:00 AM. Coffee, and chattered with a couple in the waiting room from Manchester New Hampshire.

I had two MRIs scheduled. There were two copays at $350.00 per MRI. The note from the radiology conference reads:

“Discussed patient in radiology conference and recommend right tibia MRI with and without contrast given the cartilaginous lesion with scalloping and signal on PET. MRI right tibia through the right distal femur lesion ordered. Left femur MRI ordered for left femur lesion on PET.”
Signed: Mattie Elizabeth Raiford MD Orthopaedic Oncology Fellow.

The techs were helpful and got me on the table. Roll cushion under knees, feet strapped together, weighted cover on abdomen and strapped in,  ear plugs, and an emergency button, just in case. I ask for something to cover my eyes. Their Spotify playlist is down so I’ll just have to deal with the clicks, whistles, whirrs, thumps, and so on. I’ve had MRIs before so I know what to expect, but this was a long one! Every now and then the table moves out and I wonder if it’s over, but no, the tech says something that I can’t hear because I’ve got ear plugs in. The table moves back in for more clicks and whirrs. I’m curious as to what is actually happening inside the machine to cause it to make the sounds. Sometimes it sounds like an overloaded washing machine.

I practice my best relaxation techniques in my mind.

’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
      Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
      And the mome raths outgrabe.

“Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
      The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
      The frumious Bandersnatch!”

He took his vorpal sword in hand;
      Long time the manxome foe he sought—
So rested he by the Tumtum tree
      And stood awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish thought he stood,
      The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
      And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! And through and through
      The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
      He went galumphing back.

“And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
      Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!”
      He chortled in his joy.

’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
      Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
      And the mome raths outgrabe.

• Reciting Jabberwocky inviting visualization of each word.
• Diaphragmatic breathing. Inhale through the nose for four seconds keeping chest still and tightening the diaphragm. Press lips and exhale for a count of eight. Repeat 10 times. “one two three four, one two three four five six, seven eight. Two, two three four…”
• Reciting the alphabet, with and without numbers.
  • One-A-A-One, Two-B-B-Two, Three-C-C-three, …
  • Visualize the letters and numbers as I do this.
  • Repeat backwards from Z to A.
• Move attention in my head in different directions and hold for a few seconds at each position: right, middle, left, up, down, forward, back, in, out.
• Focus on the machine noise to the exclusion of everything else and let it envelope you.
• Empty mind and invite visualization. Could be patterns, comma, faces, scenery, but don’t try to identify what I’m seeing.

An hour later, the table comes out and they sit me up to insert an IV of gadopicienol. Wikipedia says it’s a “paramagnetic macrocyclic non-ionic complex of gadolinium” and that “Above 20 °C gadolinium is the most paramagnetic element.” Back in again. It feels more uncomfortable this time – not horrible, but noticeable, and it seems to be generating some heat.

At long last the procedure is over. I haven’t moved more than a millimeter for an hour and a quarter! It’s over, and we don’t have any more appointments for a while, so it’s back to the car to return home and have lunch.